How the World Views Self Expression

“If bullied for personal characteristics, students report being bullied most frequently for their appearance (32.7%), followed by race (13%), disability (9.7%), ethnic origin (9.4%), gender (9.2%), sexual orientation (8.9%), and religion (5.8%). (National Center for Education Statistics, 2022) “

Bullies project their feelings onto their victims. They view all differences as a weakness, and try to make you a target as a result of their insecurities. Social media portrays bullies as people who are on a higher pedestal than the ordinary person. Terminology such as “OF detected, opinion rejected” belittles women and shames them whenever they post themselves or reply to people online. These terms continue to paint women in a bad light and place judgement on women because of the belief that all women are inferior to men. Additionally, schools are notorious for having bullies constantly pick on people for their benefit, from lunch money to good grades. Bullies thrive in settings that praise their behavior and feed their ego into thinking they will be better than anybody that opposes them.

Research shows that internalized trauma can be a catalyst for people to target others. Bullying can be a result of harsh stereotypes that are placed by the status quo and highlighted by social media. Tropes like “aggressive black woman” and “unkempt hair” refer to the discrimination of black people in society. These views can be harmful and lead to minorities facing racist remarks from bullies. Derogatory phrases continue to thrive on social media because people infiltrate these spaces with the intent to torment minorities and push hate speech into spaces that black people occupy online. Other factors that can result in bullying are body type, family life, self esteem and aggression. These experiences continue to take away its normalcy, and instead causes people to look for role models that are unrealistic and damaging to their mindset. This can alter how people see themselves, and lead them to take it out on others instead of healing from it.

Self discovery isn’t subjective to a certain group of people. Your class status doesn’t invalidate your experiences and need for improvement. Everyone learns about themselves in their own way and at their own pace. Your interests are an important part of your identity, and help you learn more about yourself. However, living in a world with social media has shown us how difficult it is to find people who will accept you for who you are. No matter what you do, sometimes you just won’t meet other people’s standards and are deemed “the weirdo” just for being yourself. A major part of self discovery is learning how to embrace yourself, and own your identity unapologetically, especially when no one’s around. 

My Take on Self Discovery

I can say as an emerging adult, you’ll continue to find new things you like that resonate with you. There’s always something new to learn about yourself, and there’s nothing wrong with that. It takes a lot of courage to openly express yourself. There are days where I feel nervous to share my interests. Most days I can’t bring myself to even post about my interests online. It’s a constant cycle of loving what makes me different, yet fearing how others will take it when I show my differences.

I face thoughts like;

“What adults are still sharing about their love for anime, rock, or books?” “How will people react to this?” and “What are some ‘normal’ ways to share my interests? “

“Young people whose sexual orientation, gender identity or expression does not conform to traditional gender norms are also at increased risk of school violence and bullying, the UN agency reported.”

Figuring out who you are is a one way road. There’s no reason to be so warped up in someone else’s perception of you. Taking a stand against bullying doesn’t stop at confrontation, but continues when you prioritize your self expression. I couldn’t have been the person I am today without my support system, a dozen journals and meeting some amazing people online. Reaching out to people who shared the same similarities helped me embrace my self-discovery. 

Navigating Social Media While Being Yourself

You have the freedom to express yourself in a way that is comfortable for you. No one can take your identity away from you. Discovering your authentic self within your environment is a personal journey and sets the tone for the new experiences and opportunities that await you. Another person’s opinion will always be there, but it doesn't mean it applies to you. 

Being on social media can be a double edged sword. You’ll never know how other people may take your content. Finding the right community on other platforms makes all the difference when expressing yourself. Limiting who can interact with your content is a great step to minimize conflict and allows you to be comfortable with yourself. Connecting with other people through public channels or virtual events can introduce you to the right people who will make you feel validated with the way you express yourself. 

Sources

“Bullies Target Physical Appearance, Ethnicity, Gender or Sexual Orientation – UN Reports | UN News.” United Nations, United Nations, news.un.org/en/story/2017/01/549612 . Accessed 21 July 2025. 

Ditch The Label. Why Do People Bully? The Scientific Reasons, ditchthelabel.org/why-do-people-bully . Accessed 21 July 2025. 

“Bullying Statistics.” PACER Center, 28 Feb. 2025, www.pacer.org/bullying/info/stats/ 

Ray, Rashawn, et al. “Bystander Intervention on Social Media: Examining Cyberbullying and Reactions to Systemic Racism.” Brookings, 25 Oct. 2021, www.brookings.edu/articles/bystander-intervention-on-social-media-examining-cyberbullying-and-reactions-to-systemic-racism/ .

Why People Get Picked On by “Pick Me’s”

There’s no wrong way to express yourself. Children and adolescents are exploring the world differently, and are shaped by the experiences they come across. Watching cartoons and wearing different types of clothes is a right of passage for people to redefine themselves. Our youth struggles to normalize this because people don’t know how to accept what’s out of the ordinary.